Mass Transit Hysteria

The holidays are a big time for travel. As far as mass transportation of human beings in the US goes there is probably no other time when so many people are using the various forms of mass transit available to us. I traveled on various modes of such transit this Thanksgiving weekend, bus, train, airplane and boat. As I went about my tavels, and in the time since, I have realized that there are a few things people do in mass transit that make me hate everyone.

I don't know if anyone out there readins LYMA is guilty of the following transgressions, but if you are stop immediately, and if you know anyone who is, do whatever is necessary to stop them, because these things just can't be tolerated in a civil society.

Let's go in the order that I did in my trip. First the bus. I take the bus twice a day, and I get on at the first stop so generally I get my seat and am lost in the world of podcasts until my stop, however I have noticed that Americans have no idea how to properly fill a bus. Once all of the seats are taken and you have to stand, do so as close to the back of the bus as you can. If the bus doesn't fill up all the way failure to do this is not so bad, but it is infuriating to watch some oblivious moron stand in the aisle five feet away from the door while there are people crowding up on the driver's lap and scores of others in line to get on, while the back two thirds of the aisle are empty. Also, get a little cozy, it is also annoying when people tell the driver that the bus is too full because they want to preserve their six foot buffer zone. When getting on the bus have youe money/farecard ready, don't wait until I am behind you waiting to get on to realize that you don't have any change and then search your purse for a smarttrip that may or may not be there.

I could go on about the bus, but let's move on to the metro. Two points out of many. 1) Walk left stand right, walk left stand right WALK LEFT STAND RIGHT!!!!!!! 2) When you are the platform and the train is coming and the person in front of you, who has been in front of you for the last 8-10 minutes looks up and takes a step or two toward the track, do not rush the train and cut in front of them, you are all going to get on. (a similar, much stupider phenomenon occurs at the airport luggage carosel, no need to jump in front of me and make sure your shins are touching the metal with your elbows out as soon as that buzzer sounds, your bags will not come faster if you get to the front, and if mine come first, now I have to box someone else out to get to them).

Speaking of airports, there are hundreds of travel faux pas there, but here is just one. When the airplane has arrived and we are all sitting inside parked at the gate, exit from the front of the plane first, then proceed backward. There is a reason they make you get on starting with the back, same concept applies to getting off. Along these lines, huge carry ons are really obnoxious, as much as you may think it is a superhuman feat of genious to not check bags, just do it, we don't need to wait an extra twenty minutes to deplane while you get your just barely within the limit bag out of the overhead bin.

On to the car. Since I am discussing mass transit, lets talk about leaving a full parking lot after a game/concert/etc. Never was there a simpler concept than merging, but nobody ever seems to get it. A car goes from one side, then from the other, back and forth until we all get out. Don't be the gut that tries to move up one car by ruining the system.

I don't mean to sound more pessimistic than usual (although finals don't really help with my mood), just want society as a whole to work. Happy holidays and travel safely.